I see from Hermit's blog that his mind is wondering off into analogue tea dreams of late. So it gives me a cheap excuse to republish an article I did some time ago on the subject:-
What is analogue tea? Analogue tea is, in a single a cup, a whole spiralling galaxy of milk and tea fighting convection currents and Brownian-motion, a microcosmic wonder show for your eyes only, which is sent into fresh turmoil every time you take a sip.
Sip by sip take yourself trough every taste proportion from dark moody cutting black tea ending up with reassuringly comforting milky tea. Variety is the spice of life... so why the hell do we drink digital tea? Digital tea is for the brain dead -- one monotonous consistency from top to soul destroying conformist bottom. With digital tea you can't even see below the surface, not one millimetre, and if you could it would be the same, the same, the same, the same, the same, oh the humanity!
How to make a cup of analogue tea:- put the tea bag in your cup, pour the boiling water over the tea bag and wait until it has brewed to your liking, remove the tea bag then wait a little while longer to let things calm down, then pour the milk in gently from a low altitude and from your true soul.... but do not stir it. JUST PUT THE SPOON DOWN PUNK, AND WALK AWAY!
From this humble beginning you will embark on a life long journey to be a master of analogue tea making... producing a new fleeting master piece every time you brew-up. One day you may try pouring the milk in from a lower position, more gently, or slightly off centre... or making less turbulence when removing the tea bag, no wait... perhaps this time you'll try and make it a little more turbulent, perhaps making it swirl a bit... no wait...... The possibilities are endless, infinite.
"But what if I have sugar, I have to stir it then don't I?". Blah, blah, blah. Analogue tea is not meant to be easy. If you really still haven't grown-out of having tooth decay granules in your drinks then try putting the sugar in the cup along with the tea bag so that when you pour boiling water onto it, it practically dissolves anyway. Or stir it before you put the milk in, leaving it a minute to calm down before introducing the milk. Work it out for yourself, it's all part of the life long journey.
There are no rules to analogue tea ... it's just black tea at the very top and white tea at the very bottom. It's like real life: neither black nor white and never simple. It is an infinite variation from black to white, or mathematically speaking an infinite number of states between zero and one... it is: analogue.
Oh yes and remember to buy fair trade tea, or else when you go to look upon your spiralling galaxy of wonderment in your cup, you'll instead see the suffering of your fellow man, who you have enslaved, staring right back at you.
